The majority of us have split personalities when it comes to making plans. On one hand, we want to go out and be social, see new people (or our friends) and enjoy ourselves. On the other hand, we want to stay in bed and binge watch Game of Thrones before Season 8 drops. There’s a conflicting dilemma inside of us all when it comes to going out. We want to be grandmas and stay in our sweatpants, eat snacks in bed. But, we also want to go out and have some fun—right? But, which side of us always wins? Canceling all of our plans last minute, always.
1. You know you’ve been a sh*tty friend lately because you haven’t seen your group in so long.
2. You always respond the group chat when they say “it’s been forever! We need to get drinks ASAP!” with a simple “YES.”
3. But, deep down, you’re already regretting saying yes, because you don’t want to interact with the human population when you can interact with your dog, in bed, away from everyone.
4. They pick a night that works for everyone—and, you’re already coming up with mental excuses.
5. You know you should go out, but you don’t want to go out.
6. You check your work emails to see if there’s any project you’re behind on to use as an excuse.
7. You check your bank account to say you’re “too broke” until you get your next paycheck.
8. Your friends start texting you on the side saying “please don’t flake again.”
9. You’re counting how many bottles of wine you can drink at home for free instead of the $$$ you’re going to have to waste on watered-down drinks at the bar.
10. You lie and text your friends back about how excited you are and “DW, I WON’T FLAKE ;)”
11. When the weekend rolls around, you start practicing all of your excuses in the shower, narrowing down which one sounds the “most real.”
12. You start to dodge the group text’s messages about when and where everyone is meeting up, because “sorry, work is SO busy today!!”
13. The minute you get home from work, you slip into sweatpants and crawl into bed with a large glass of wine.
14. You text your friends saying you’ve had the roughest day at work and your boss was such a d*ck—you feel mentally and physically drained and know you won’t be fun to have around at all.
15. You hold your breath to see if they’ll get mad…
16. But, secretly don’t care because you had no intention of ever leaving the house, to begin with. Cheers.