22 Of The Stupidest Things Anyone Has Ever Heard

4 min


12. Every Continent Gets Its Own Moon

Not me, but our safari guide in South Africa said he once heard a woman ask her husband, “Honey, is that the same moon we see in Texas?”

11. This Is Money Management

Literally had a guy ask me yesterday “if I hit the cash back button, does the money come out of my account?”

Dude was like 30 and he thought cash back was just…free money I guess?

10. No One Understands The Moon

“A full moon only happens once every 10 years, right?”

9. The Perfect Free Nipple Piercing Scam

I’m a postpartum nurse. A patient asked me “when will the doctor be here to pierce my nipples so I can breastfeed?”

8. You’re Not Right

I once asked someone to look to the left of something on her screen. She asked “My left or your left?”

We were both facing the same direction.

7. Birds Of A Feather

While working as a butcher, I showed a deli clerk how to break down a whole chicken into pieces. I show her, “two breasts, two wings, two legs, two thighs.” she looks at me and asks, “which part does the turkey come from?”

6. Guac Is Extra, Lettuce Is Unheard Of

The guy ahead of me asked the Chipotle employee, “What’s ‘lay-tuck-ee’?”

It was lettuce. He asked what lettuce was.

5. She’s Got You There

My twenty-something daughter asked why we never see squirrel eggs. Us parent types responded that’s because squirrels are mammals and don’t lay eggs like birds do. To which she responded, then show me an infant squirrel / “breastfeeding” squirrel.

This led to a conversation that was much longer than needed to be.

4. Slowly

“How did we build the mountains?” – my brothers fiance, while we drove through the rockies

3. That’s How You Keep Prices Low

The insurance company asked if there was a chance that my dad’s amputated leg would grow back.