Woman Bears Twins In South Carolina, Calls Them Donald And Trump

A South Carolinian couple made headlines today after giving birth to twins and naming them Donald and Trump. The birth of the twins occurred this morning at Grand Strand Medical Center, only hours before South Carolina’s Republican voters will show up to the polls across the state to cast ballots in the GOP’s third presidential nominating contest.

“We weren’t planning on naming them after Donald Trump at first, but it is clearly a divine sign that our next president shows up in our state on the day my little sunshines are born” explained Latifa Huxley, proud mother of the two. “Donald Trump is a bright, wealthy, successful man with strong moral values that represents what America is all about. This man is a symbol of the greatness of what America once was and shall be again” she told local reporters, visibly emotional.

Both parents strongly believe the timing of the South Carolina GOP primary with the birth of their twins is no coincidence.

“It is truly a blessing and a God-given sign” says Damian Huxley, father of the twins. “After all the division Obama has brought upon this country, it is a great privilege to have my children born on this auspicious day,” he explains with pride. “I don’t care if my president is black or white, all I know is that Trump is a man of his word and we believe him when he says that he will make America great again,” he adds.

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Nathan Davidson

A master of the internet farts and sciences. Often accused of being into movies, television, sports, gaming and long walks to the kitchen. Spent the last decade writing about the absurdity that is the internet with a primary focus on comedy, sports, entertainment and exposing cats for being evil monsters. Somehow achieved a BA in Advertising from the Michigan State University and MA in Copywriting from The Portfolio Center. Hobbies include keeping “that’s what she said” jokes fashionable, imitating noises like a parakeet and preventing political arguments. List writer for Ranker and former Editor-in-Chief of World Wide Interweb.