Pregnant women out in public tend to get a lot of attention for their condition—not so much that men automatically give up their seats for them on public transport, but enough that they are barraged with unsolicited advice, tons of personal questions, and of course the touching—the touching!—of strangers eager to feel their bellies. It’s strange and overwhelming, and it can be pretty hard on people who are used to keeping to themselves.
So when someone created a Reddit post asking women who were or had been pregnant what the most inappropriate thing anyone had ever said to them during those 10 months was, people had a lot of stories. Here are the most WTF ones that will absolutely make your jaw drop.
1. That’s kind of the point?
“I was eight months pregnant and wearing an old T-shirt that said, ‘Today is a good day to leave me alone.’ An old woman approached me and said that I shouldn’t wear that shirt in my ‘condition’ because it would discourage people from asking to touch my belly.”—Idclmbf2016
2. Um, in her uterus, Iguess?
“I’ve been asked four times where I conceived. I’m like, ‘How in depth do you really want that answer?'”—abaihyachi
3. Who can keep track?
“I was at swimming lessons when a guy asked me whether the baby I was carrying was by the same father as my other children. Umm, how is that any of your business?!”—fsr87
4. Sounds like what that place really needs is better coworkers.
“I told a coworker I was pregnant, and he said, ‘Great — just what we need! Another woman in your department going out on maternity leave!'”—thewhaler
5. There are some thoughts that should stay inside the head.
“My boobs grew from a 32C to a 34EE during my pregnancy, and someone at work said, ‘I bet your hubby loves your boobs now!’ As if there was something wrong with my boobs before.”—poppicat2248
6. Pics or it didn’t happen.
“Someone asked me exactly how we conceived twins since they don’t run in either of our families. They said we must have done IVF. So I replied, ‘Nope, we had sex. A lot.”—kaleidoscope_eyes11
7. Thanks so much!
“One of my coworkers took one glance at me and said, ‘You couldn’t possibly get any bigger!’ I was only six months along.”—hyphie
8. Statistically? Or did he know something?
A maternal fetal specialist — who I’d just met— told me to get an IUD after my baby is born instead of a tying my tubes because when I get divorced, I’ll want to be able to have babies with my new man. I said, ‘God forbid, but I suppose something could happen to my husband.’ And he replied, ‘Divorce is more likely.’“—dustbunnylurking
9. Hi, hello!
“Someone asked my boyfriend in front of me if my vagina felt different during pregnancy sex.”—occupandi_temporis
10. Again, thanks!
“I’m an OBGYN, and an old woman said to one of my patients, ‘You must be having a girl, because you are HIDEOUS!'”—thelittlemermaid7
11. That’s really “need to know” information.
“Towards the end of my pregnancy, my male bossasked me exactly how dilated I was. Please don’t ask a woman how many centimeters her vagina has stretched since the last time you saw her.”—almostthcrazycatlady
12. Yes, that’s where she’s carrying the baby, too.
“Someone looked me up and down while I was pregnant and said, ‘Oh, it all went to your thighs, didn’t it?'”—5RabbitsInALongCoat
13. “And she left me and married him and they lived happily ever after.”
“A guy once catcalled my wife and when she turned around and he saw she was pregnant, he said, ‘Well, I guess it’s safe to say you put out.'”—Not_Much_Help
14. This woman is a Lifetime movie waiting to happen.
“When my wife was pregnant, an ex-colleague of mine told us shereally liked to hug pregnant women from behind, stroke their bump, and pretend it was hers.”—size_matters_not
15. “Haha, I couldn’t marry the father, I don’t even know who he is!”
“My favorite was when a customer came into my store, saw that I was pregnant, and said, ‘I hope you’re married.'”—sai_gunslinger
16. This is super helpful.
“I was talking about morning sickness with someone at work and I mentioned that I hadn’t had any yet. Well, that person said, ‘My sister’s doctor said morning sickness is a good sign. Since you haven’t had it, your baby will probably be deformed.'”—glynndah
17. Did they want to see?
“Someone actually asked me if my vagina was shaved.”—occupandi_temporis
18. The position was called Nosy Human.
“I was asked several times what sex position I conceived in. Someone even asked me that in front of my mother!”—redsetded