If you are unwilling to admit there is a non-sexual purpose to the female breast, and that small children should be fed whenever they are hungry, then you’re the weirdo. Take one of those online “is this a male or female nipple?” quizzes if you disagree.
Anyway, an anonymous post written on the Dartford Gossip Facebook page a couple of years ago has been making the rounds once again, and you’ll fully understand why when you read it. It’s got everything! Drama, a grody husband, and body fluids.
The post reads, in full:
“To the lady [at] Dartford park who thought it was appropriate to breastfeed her baby [whilst] my child and very easily distracted husband sat near by…I don’t think it was necessary for you to react the way you did just because I asked you to go somewhere private, telling me to f**k off and squirting me with your boobs was incredibly uncalled for. I hope you are ashamed of yourself!”
In case you missed that penultimate sentence:
TELLING ME TO F**K OFF AND SQUIRTING ME WITH YOUR BOOBS WAS INCREDIBLY UNCALLED FOR.
While most people agreed that the breastfeeding mother’s reaction was a tad uncalled for, the general consensus seemed to be: If your husband is that easily distracted, find yourself a new one.
Also: Get a grip, lady!
What is it with people and nipples, anyway? Why is there more outrage over female nipples than male nipples? Why is there any outrage at all? Will we, as a society, ever come to an agreed understanding that all nipples are created equal?
That being said, it’s never cool to splash bodily fluids on someone without their consent, no matter how much of a twat they’re being.