German Soccer Player Dropped From Team For 'Nutella Addiction'

German soccer player Max Kruse has been dropped by his team for two games after after a local nightclub outed him for an addiction to Nutella.

While it wasn’t a trail of Nutella skidmarks that led to Kruse’s demise, he did leave 75,000 Euros in a cab from a poker night at the club because he was perhaps disoriented trying to get his latest hazenut-chocolate fix.

“We need players who are focused on football,” Germany Manager Joachim Low told Bild (via BBC.com), “and also understand their role as role models. I talked with Max about what I expect from players on and off the pitch. His actions in the last weeks were unprofessional.”

Wolfsburg director Klaus Allofs spoke with Kruse about his diet at the club’s winter training camp last week. “The aim is to support our players to deliver optimum performance,” Allofs said. “Max needs to correct a few things.”

Let’s hope poor Max never gets his hands on a bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos that would undoubtedly end his professional career.

VIA

Nathan Davidson

A master of the internet farts and sciences. Often accused of being into movies, television, sports, gaming and long walks to the kitchen. Spent the last decade writing about the absurdity that is the internet with a primary focus on comedy, sports, entertainment and exposing cats for being evil monsters. Somehow achieved a BA in Advertising from the Michigan State University and MA in Copywriting from The Portfolio Center. Hobbies include keeping “that’s what she said” jokes fashionable, imitating noises like a parakeet and preventing political arguments. List writer for Ranker and former Editor-in-Chief of World Wide Interweb.