Patricia Grisafi
When exes reconnect with each other, the result can either be horrifying or wholesome. Hopefully, it’s the latter. No one wants to be confronted with memories of trauma or put through the ringer, and when you run into an ex randomly, that can be the case.
Folks on Reddit are sharing their stories of running into exes they’ve deemed “crazy” — and while some deserve the title of toxic, and some have gotten even worse, others have managed to work their issues out and move forward in healthy ways.
1. Hold Me Tight And Kiss Me
“More crazy. We dated on and off, he’d ghost me after a few months of dating, then call me a week or 2 later crying that he had moved out of town or had taken a new job and apologize for ruining our relationship…etc. I finally refused to take him back after almost 2 years and he took it as “I need to shower her with attention and not take no for an answer” I ended up changing my phone number and threatening to call the cops a few times when he showed up. I eventually moved out of the state for unrelated reasons. After about 4 or 5 years I went back home to visit for the holidays. He had seen me on a hometown news special that my family was in and randomly showed up at my parent’s house looking like life had chewed him up and spit him out. He begged me to take him back and after I refused, he tried really hard to get my phone number and when I told him to leave or I’d call the cops it somehow translated in his mind to ‘hold me tight and kiss me’ I managed to eventually scream and my sister came out with a broom.” —
2. A Genuine Apology
“We dated for a year and when I broke up with him he threatened to kill himself and wished terrible things would happen to me over the phone and later cyber harassed me for months. After about 4-5 months of ignoring/blocking him and calling the police to do a welfare check after that initial phone call it stopped. Just over a year after we broke up I was invited to a mutual friends birthday. It wasn’t until I got there she said that he was coming too but she didn’t know we would both say yes to coming. I said I would be fine unless he got weird about it then I would leave. He saw me, said ‘Oh F*ck’ and walked off to another section of the party. He avoided me for a couple hours then came up to me really nervously and said hi. He said he wanted to apologise for how he was during the relationship and after. He said he was staying with his grandparents, seeing a psychologist and had quit drugs and was really looking after himself. He said he just wanted to take the opportunity to apologise for everything and said it wasn’t him trying to get back with me. I was supportive of him and we chatted for a while at the party. Then when I got home the weight of it kinda crashed on me and I bawled my eyes out. It felt good getting a proper genuine apology and I only hope he sticks to it and continues on the right path.” —
3. Her Better Version
“She’s doing great and as far as I know she’s now in a very healthy relationship. When we met about a year after we had broken up, it was because she called me and wanted to talk. Apparently our breakup was what helped her realize a bunch of traits she hated in her family and had replicated towards me and her previous relationships, and wanted to apologize, we hugged, chatted, had dinner and then each went on to live our lives. We’ve texted a couple times since and I’m glad to see she took the decisions towards the path she believes it is her better version.” —
4. Whose Baby?
“Not my ex but my husband’s ex. I Ran into her at the store. I had my baby with me. She ran up to us and started cooing at my child, saying he had her eyes and wondering if it was really her baby instead of mine. I gave birth to this child. I don’t know what she was thinking. Very weird encounter. I stopped going to that store.” —
5. Stabby
“I briefly had a FWB relationship with a girl in college that kept a combat knife under her pillow, the thing looked like a freaking Rambo knife. Things eventually fizzled out with her and we stopped talking, my friends jokingly nicknamed her ‘Stabby’, and the name stuck, everyone went on with their lives. Two years later, she got expelled because she got into an argument with her boyfriend in a public place and stabbed him in the leg, turns out the nickname was prophetic.” —
6. Ruined Her Life
“Like 3 years later, she told me she really missed me. I said we should catch up sometime, and gave her my new number. Got a bunch of texts saying I ruined her life, because she called her new BF my name during sex. Blocked her immediately.” —
7. In Recovery
“My crazy ex got his sh*t together. He spiraled into drug addiction some time after we had dated but eventually got sober and does sobriety work now. We’ve been connected through social media but didn’t keep in touch closely during this time. He eventually moved away and a few years ago he posted that he was flying into my city and was wondering if anyone could give him a ride from the airport to a hospital. His dad was in the hospital on life support and as next of kin, he had to make the decision to take him off. He didn’t get many responses so I said I would take him. Picking him up was the first time I’d seen him in years, but all things considered, he was calm and it was fine and at least for me, didn’t quite feel like there had been so much time since we really interacted. We were in the car for maybe 20 minutes and I remember wishing we could’ve taken more time to catch up but obviously he had a lot on his plate. I told him if he needed anything while in town that he could hit me up, but he didn’t. He’s still doing well for himself and I’m glad I was able to help him out.” —
8. The Best Friend
“Had dinner with an ex about ten years after we broke up. She wasn’t crazy before or after we broke up but turns out her now ex best friend/roommate was. Apparently after the break up her then best friend pretended that she was now dating me. The roommate would as my ex if it was okay that we were dating and ask my ex if she could sleep somewhere else so we didn’t keep her up and what not. I was floored when I found out. I never even saw the best friend after we broke up.” —
9. Threesomes
“Mine called me on her wedding night crying because they brought her best friend in for a threesome and her new husband was banging the best friend currently. Never been so glad to be just a friend.” —
10. I Had Changed
“They were the same as they were before. I was different though. At that point I’d realized she wasn’t crazy and that when we were together I wasn’t emotionally mature enough to see how I was responsible for a lot of the problems in our relationship. When I looked back on her as a person and not as a ‘crazy ex’ she became someone I was proud to have had an encounter with. I was happy to see we didn’t damage each other too deeply. I’m grateful to see her success.” —
11. Stalking
“I was walking down the street and she slowed down to offer me a ride. I accepted because her hair was a different colour and she was wearing big sunglasses, so I mistook her for a friend. Once I got into the passenger seat, I saw the toddler in the car seat behind me (not mine) who proceeded to ask ‘Mommy, where’s his girlfriend?’ She then drove me to my girlfriend (now wife)’s house. I didn’t have to give her directions despite the two of them never meeting. It was frightening.” —
12. Jail
“Found him being escorted into jail. Apparently he was arrested after multiple accusations of S.A. I was a victim of his, but I was too scared at the time to reach out to the police, bc I thought they wouldn’t believe me. Proud of those girls who was brave enough to stand up to him, though.” —
13. Anklet
“She joked about how her new ankle monitor (some minor crime so it wasn’t super crazy as much as it was weird to bring up) was still more fashionable than the anklet I gave her when we dated. To be fair it was a hideous anklet.” —
14. Rock Bottom
“I bumped into a guy I dated super briefly. It started off great, then he got violent with me and I had to get the police involved. He left before they arrived, turned out he’d given me a fake last name so I couldn’t press charges. I ran into him at a party a few months after and he apologized, and explained to me that he had been on a months long drug bender (amphetamines mostly), and that what he did to me was his basically his rock bottom and his behavior shocked him so much that he got himself into treatment. I thanked him for the apology, but told him how traumatic that ordeal was for me and told him to never speak to me again. He was understanding, apologized again, walked away, and that was that.” —
15. The Same Sandwich
“We made small talk in the line at subway. Both married now, he has kids, blah blah…then we ordered the exact mf same sub with all the exact same mf sh*t on it. My mind was blown, we parted ways and that was that.” —
16. Lots In Common
“I won’t get into the details why I called her but I reached out to her after 20 years. there was a specific situation that I knew she had experience with and could help me with. And she did. We talked for a while and it was a really interesting conversation. Turns out I had taken up one of the hobbies that she was interested in and she had taken up one that I was very interested in. I was surprised how much we still had in common after all this time. And she was a very nice person. I had forgotten all of these things but I suppose this was among the reasons we had been together so long ago. Honestly it was nice and I’m glad that we spoke.” —
